The Daily Dookie

You’ve read correctly; I’m talking about poop! As different as all of our children are, they all have that one thing in common and that one thing draws us together in solidarity.

Over the years, I’ve babysat, nannied, been around (you get the point) a lot of toddlers. The one thing I noticed amongst all of them is that they all had a fairly regular ‘schedule’. Piggle does not. I never know when the assault on my nostrils will happen. He’s a ticking poop bomb! I was really looking forward to being able to plan my day around a deuce, but I guess, as with most other ‘normal’ toddler behaviors, I’m S.O.L. (pardon the pun).

To all of you with newborns, let me just say that I am jealous. Until about 10 months old, I could have shoved the boy’s diaper right up my nose and not even minded. There was no smell. Now, however, I can detect Piggle-droppings from a mile away, and it’s not a skill I brag about. These bad boys are toxic!

We recently discovered there is a difference in poo smells, and of course, Piggle’s would be the worst kind. As it happens, he is allergic to milk. Those of you who are lactose intolerant may be able to relate. It is the epitome of stink when this boy drops a load, and unfortunately, because we were giving him milk, it was happening 78 times a day.

We’ve since cut dairy out of his diet as much as possible, and things are slowly going back to normal. I’m hoping, once it clears his system completely, he’ll get into a routine. It would make life so much easier! I could save money on diapers, and I wouldn’t have to search frantically for somewhere to change him in public, while praying he doesn’t blow out the sides!

Speaking of bum changes on the fly, a few friends and I were talking about how inaccessible so many public places seem to be. Even restaurants that offer kids meals don’t supply a change station. I can’t even begin to count how many times I’ve had to clean the boy’s ass on a table or a bench. I’ve even gone to such extremes as to do it on a slide at the park.

Granted, Piggle isn’t one of those kids that freaks his shit when his tukus is dirty. He couldn’t care less. All of the random places I’ve changed him have been more of a statement than anything. That’s right! I’m a rebel!

I really don’t care about the glaring and whispers from people around. If they were in my situation, they’d be wishing they were bold enough to do it, too. I’m hoping that, one of these days, an owner or manager will take notice and take the necessary step to facilitate things for us mothers. I also believe that every family-friendly establishment should be required to install change tables in both male and female bathrooms. Yea, dads, I’m thinking about you, too!

Chances are, my voice won’t be heard, so I will continue to change Piggle on the most accessible flat surfaces if I’m not provided with the proper place to do so. I’d urge you to do the same. Businesses cater to the public, not the other way around. Just like the mall not being mom-friendly, these establishments need to realize that we are probably their biggest source of income. The least they can do is give us a clean area to wipe our child’s ass!

First off u are so not Alone… Though I laugh at ur blog posts, they really just remind me of my own crazy life. So thanks for the entertainment. The juster is 15 months and is plum crazy! We’ve had our share of poopscapades… Which included lots of finger painting …gag!

Also wanted to share that she too can’t have dairy and goats milk has been our saving grace! It’s supposed to be the closest to breastmilk.. Look it up

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